Saturday, August 05, 2006

Cuba Libra

To my intense irritation, James Taranto beat me to the punch on Fidel Castro:
"'E's passed on! This tyrant is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible!! This is an ex-tyrant!!"
Here's a link to the entire sketch.

If he is indeed "off the twig", it's pretty unlikely his brother will follow in his footsteps. Take my case - if I was dictator of England and "kicked the bucket", neither of my brothers would be satisfactory substitutes.

Brother 1 would only allow Real Ale in pubs, require smoking everywhere, make mongrel whippets the National Dog, and mandate that all household objects be made of wood. And I think he'd bomb France.

Brother 2 would ban all but Routemaster buses, mandate the removal of German rolling stock from the railways, fire all the Brit government workforce except for the cops and military, and force all kids to beome proficient in one musical instrument. He'd probably bomb France too.

How different from my own beneficent rule! Except for bombing France, that is.